Okay, so lately I’ve been feeling like I’m in a dark place mentally. It’s been tough, you know? So, I decided to actually do something about it, instead of just wallowing. Here’s what I did, step-by-step, and how it’s been helping (or not helping, sometimes).
Day 1: Admitting It (Ugh)
First thing I did was just admit to myself that I wasn’t okay. Sounds simple, but it’s actually the hardest part, right? I literally sat on my couch and said out loud, “I feel like crap.” It felt… weird, but also kind of freeing.
Day 2: Reaching Out (Scary!)
I texted a close friend. Just a simple, “Hey, been feeling down lately. Wanna chat?” message. This was terrifying. I hate feeling vulnerable. But, she responded pretty quickly, and we ended up talking on the phone for like an hour. It didn’t magically fix everything, but it felt good to not be alone with my thoughts.
Day 3: Trying to Move My Body (So. Hard.)
Everyone always says exercise helps, right? Well, I hate exercise. But I forced myself to go for a walk. Just around the block. It was slow, and I felt super self-conscious, but I did it. And honestly? I felt maybe 1% better afterward. Baby steps.
Day 4: Journaling…Sort Of (Messy and Awkward)
- Opened a notebook.
- Stared at the blank page for 10 minutes.
- Wrote down a bunch of random, angry words.
- Felt a little bit of relief, like letting out some pressure.
I tried journaling. I’m not really a “journal person,” but I figured, why not? I didn’t write anything profound, just a jumble of feelings and complaints. It felt awkward at first, like I was writing a cheesy diary entry, but it did help to get some of the negativity out of my head and onto paper.
Day 5: Small Victory (Tiny, But Still a Victory)
I managed to clean my kitchen. It was a disaster zone. Dishes piled up, old food in the fridge… the whole nine yards. It took me most of the day, with lots of breaks to just sit and stare at the wall, but I did it. And having a clean kitchen, even though it seems so small, made me feel a tiny bit more in control.
Day 6 and 7: Sliding Backwards and restarting
I felt down that it’s not a linear thing, and sometimes I would stay in bed all day. So I know I need to keep trying these things, even when I don’t want to. Especially when I don’t want to.
So, yeah, that’s where I’m at. It’s a process, a messy, sometimes frustrating process. But I’m trying. And I think that’s what matters, right?
